[correct. can't hear words that riff doesn't remember! but they kind of would like to gloss over that because it's...whatever that was. but they're also aware that maybe that isn't fair, so okay. calming down.]
...this isn't the first time I've seen that. Just kinda thought it'd be a little easier the times after.
Death used to be an everyday occurrence for me, and my people, but I would never say it gets easier. 'Twas only that you've grieved once before and, when you know how you grieve, you can readily assuage the sorrow without letting it fester. Still, it is a long and painful road.
It is not the same experience as your memory, but...
[ If it helps Riff feel that they aren't weak or abnormal for reacting poorly despite seeing it a couple of times now. ]
It will not become easier forthwith, Lord Riff. You will need to face your hurts in time.
[they, like, hear what aymeric is saying but at the same time they're not entirely connected to it just yet.]
...no, I don't. [no?] I didn't even know about this until these stupid bubbles started showing up. So why do I...I don't even know if it matters anymore. Does it?
[it does because they're going to obsess over it because it's very obviously theirs, and they're missing so many context clues. the question is more asked in the kind of way a person asks in a panic when they are desperately ignoring the right answer.]
[ being told no is very funny because it's like yelling at aymeric "i will keep running and i will die with this" and he's like yeah this seems right if estinien is also your color. ]
... Let us take another breath first, then we can think through this together.
It would vary on how much you've come to terms with what happened and how you feel. If you don't, it haunts you later... It may even affect how you treat others, whether you realize it or not.
When I was young, there were times where I would speak out of place… Due to the frustration spawned from the hushed yet clear rumors of my birth. ‘Twas quite unbecoming of a noble and reflected poorly of my house.
[ basically
he was fucking emo and had daddy issues, so sometimes he was rude. ]
...I dunno, dude. Kinda sounds like those rumors were unbecoming on all of those people and reflected poorly on them, too, for spreading it. I think I can understand the frustration.
[they are now moving away from the point, but talking about aymeric is a little more interesting to them at the moment.]
... Aye, they were whispers I couldn't dispute so easily. Discrimination by one's birth was heavily ingrained in our society, unless you can prove your worth.
The rumors hurt me, so did the mistreatment, and it took me mayhap years to come to terms with my reality, but I chose to not let those whispers define me. I proved my worth and found in time those memories hurt me no longer. I was free.
[ ... ]
No one is asking you to overcome this overnight. You barely know the context of that memory, so obsessing over it would do you little good... But you may at least acknowledge how it makes you feel, Lord Riff.
...it sounds like a sign of strength to be able to get over stuff like that. Even if it hurt to get there. I'm glad you made it past that.
[which like. is true. they are glad. they also just don't quite think it's the same for them.]
I don't really know how acknowledging that will help anybody else though. You know? It feels terrible and it just kinda proves that it's a bad idea to try to leave this place.
[ Hm. Despite how Aymeric doesn’t agree, he smiles anyway. ]
You cannot help others if you cannot help yourself first and foremost. [ Places that gently and: ] I don’t think you’ve realized, but you’ve expressed how it makes you feel. Good work.
[me as well aymeric. after a moment, riff sort of just...deflates.]
...I think I always have questions I want answered, but I don't think they're always the same ones you guys are looking for. It's okay. [...] I can't help other people without helping myself first, sure, but when the thing that helps is directly opposite of what you guys want...you get it, right?
[why they're just really ignoring the shit out of stuff.]
Are they truly in opposition? If we were to find a path of return, you can still make a choice to stay here and avoid the fate you witnessed in that memory.
[ for now that’s their choice until I guess more lore comes out where the prism is dangerous and we should leave ]
… But I imagine you’ve been hassled some about the Prism and its dangers. A number of us can be adamant.
Dunno. Maybe that's true, but there are people who don't seem to think it's okay to let us stay here either. You guys want to leave. We want you to stay. I think that's in opposition.
[they do not reply about that second part because it is true.]
I was. [they will not deny that!] But some of you aren't so bad, and...it would just kinda suck to have you here and then suddenly be gone after this long. Especially when we don't know what would happen if you did find a way to leave.
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I don’t wish to simply gloss over what we saw… It has caused you much distress.
[ And it would be as bad to just… Ignore that? ]
Fret not, I won’t press. Take your time, deep breaths.
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...this isn't the first time I've seen that. Just kinda thought it'd be a little easier the times after.
[it is not.]
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It is not the same experience as your memory, but...
[ If it helps Riff feel that they aren't weak or abnormal for reacting poorly despite seeing it a couple of times now. ]
It will not become easier forthwith, Lord Riff. You will need to face your hurts in time.
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...no, I don't. [no?] I didn't even know about this until these stupid bubbles started showing up. So why do I...I don't even know if it matters anymore. Does it?
[it does because they're going to obsess over it because it's very obviously theirs, and they're missing so many context clues. the question is more asked in the kind of way a person asks in a panic when they are desperately ignoring the right answer.]
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... Let us take another breath first, then we can think through this together.
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...which part do we need to think through again? [help]
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We can begin here: "does it matter anymore?"
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[no, that's called running away, idiot.]
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[ He hopes that makes sense. ]
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[aymeric are you okay actually?]
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When I was young, there were times where I would speak out of place… Due to the frustration spawned from the hushed yet clear rumors of my birth. ‘Twas quite unbecoming of a noble and reflected poorly of my house.
[ basically
he was fucking emo and had daddy issues, so sometimes he was rude. ]
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...I dunno, dude. Kinda sounds like those rumors were unbecoming on all of those people and reflected poorly on them, too, for spreading it. I think I can understand the frustration.
[they are now moving away from the point, but talking about aymeric is a little more interesting to them at the moment.]
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... Aye, they were whispers I couldn't dispute so easily. Discrimination by one's birth was heavily ingrained in our society, unless you can prove your worth.
The rumors hurt me, so did the mistreatment, and it took me mayhap years to come to terms with my reality, but I chose to not let those whispers define me. I proved my worth and found in time those memories hurt me no longer. I was free.
[ ... ]
No one is asking you to overcome this overnight. You barely know the context of that memory, so obsessing over it would do you little good... But you may at least acknowledge how it makes you feel, Lord Riff.
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...it sounds like a sign of strength to be able to get over stuff like that. Even if it hurt to get there. I'm glad you made it past that.
[which like. is true. they are glad. they also just don't quite think it's the same for them.]
I don't really know how acknowledging that will help anybody else though. You know? It feels terrible and it just kinda proves that it's a bad idea to try to leave this place.
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[ Hm. Despite how Aymeric doesn’t agree, he smiles anyway. ]
You cannot help others if you cannot help yourself first and foremost. [ Places that gently and: ] I don’t think you’ve realized, but you’ve expressed how it makes you feel. Good work.
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ok no there's no emotion-sharing but riff does stare at aymeric for a second.]
Dude, did you just trick me? [no, you're just an idiot, riff.]
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… Nay, I don’t believe I used any ploys. I had only wanted to aid you when you showed struggle. It seemed you had questions you wanted answered.
My apologies if my actions and words were duplicitous.
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...I think I always have questions I want answered, but I don't think they're always the same ones you guys are looking for. It's okay. [...] I can't help other people without helping myself first, sure, but when the thing that helps is directly opposite of what you guys want...you get it, right?
[why they're just really ignoring the shit out of stuff.]
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[ for now that’s their choice until I guess more lore comes out where the prism is dangerous and we should leave ]
… But I imagine you’ve been hassled some about the Prism and its dangers. A number of us can be adamant.
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[they do not reply about that second part because it is true.]
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[ damn riff is attached?? ]
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Made some yours?
[ we are going to dance around leaving ]
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