Personally, I don't... really believe people who die are around to see us or have thoughts about the way we remember them. What's gone is gone. But I like to believe they're at peace. Peace is nice.
[kumon can think about it however he wants, though.]
This sort of remembering, honoring them...I find the people who it helps are the ones left behind. Someone else saw the flowers you left last week, and left a note. Someone saw the flowers and the note and decided to leave some origami. And maybe another person saw all of those things together, and had a gentle thought about somebody who's gone.
Grief is a messy, painful process. It can tear you up inside if you let it fester, but going through it is also good for us. What's important is letting ourselves make that transition over time, letting the pain and anger become something that's maybe still sad, or bittersweet, but has a gentler shape. Kind reminders, rituals to honor them, expressing love...all of that is probably helping someone else make that transition through grief.
[Peace is nice, but he's never really been surrounded by this much death before. Are they here, are they gone? He doesn't know. Maybe they are, maybe they aren't. But there are always people left behind.
He has enough awareness that it's something that happens in life, of course. But murders and executions seem... wrong. Having lives cut off so suddenly is something to be mourned.
Kumon listens quietly, nodding slightly. Kindness, honoring them and love. It does help the people who are alive.
His voice is soft, when he asks.]
... Is it supposed to happen so much in such a short amount of time?
[It's hard to process it. It's hard to accept and move forward when it happens every week. When he gets close to accepting their deaths, something else happens and it feels like a backslide. Does it ever really get easier?
But at least he can do this much for everyone. At least, he can give them flowers.]
There's no supposed to with these things. Sometimes, yes, a lot of people die in a short time. And that's hard, but death isn't very concerned with fairness.
I wish it wasn't this way. Especially for all of you. But...the way we handle the worst times matters. You're doing a good thing, that's what I'm trying to say.
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Personally, I don't... really believe people who die are around to see us or have thoughts about the way we remember them. What's gone is gone. But I like to believe they're at peace. Peace is nice.
[kumon can think about it however he wants, though.]
This sort of remembering, honoring them...I find the people who it helps are the ones left behind. Someone else saw the flowers you left last week, and left a note. Someone saw the flowers and the note and decided to leave some origami. And maybe another person saw all of those things together, and had a gentle thought about somebody who's gone.
Grief is a messy, painful process. It can tear you up inside if you let it fester, but going through it is also good for us. What's important is letting ourselves make that transition over time, letting the pain and anger become something that's maybe still sad, or bittersweet, but has a gentler shape. Kind reminders, rituals to honor them, expressing love...all of that is probably helping someone else make that transition through grief.
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He has enough awareness that it's something that happens in life, of course. But murders and executions seem... wrong. Having lives cut off so suddenly is something to be mourned.
Kumon listens quietly, nodding slightly. Kindness, honoring them and love. It does help the people who are alive.
His voice is soft, when he asks.]
... Is it supposed to happen so much in such a short amount of time?
[It's hard to process it. It's hard to accept and move forward when it happens every week. When he gets close to accepting their deaths, something else happens and it feels like a backslide. Does it ever really get easier?
But at least he can do this much for everyone. At least, he can give them flowers.]
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There's no supposed to with these things. Sometimes, yes, a lot of people die in a short time. And that's hard, but death isn't very concerned with fairness.
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[If it's enough or not? He can't tell.]
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[it's still touch week, so. a hand on his shoulder, nice and calming.]
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Thanks, Shale.
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