I kinda think I've been fumbling with everything for way longer than anyone knows. Fate's so...complicated. You know I used to be able to change it, but even then it was always about guessing.
...does it ever get any easier? Letting it go and do what it's meant to do.
[ that gets vax to laugh, shaking his head. god. that doesn't even begin to cover it. he shifts a bit, bumping his shoulder against rindo's. ]
... It doesn't. I don't think so. I think people like us are always going to want to try and change our path. 's hard, knowing some things are inescapable. [ thoughtful and wry, here. vax looks away, up at the sky overhead. ] She told me once, that you can bend fate and twist it, but never really break it. I think I spent my whole life jumping on the strings of it and fucking it up to try and avoid it.
Even right now. Coming here surprised me - 's making it hard to accept going, again. I thought I had that shit locked up. Turns out you meet a bunch of assholes you like, and you've got to figure out how to say goodbye to them all over again.
I don't know if I'd ever want to break fate. I just wanted to change it to make things work the way they should have the first time.
[...but he nods.]
I don't know how to say goodbye very well. I don't think I ever have, even when I did have time to prepare. Letters were a nice idea, but...I don't think I can do that either. So I've been thinking of other ways to try and prepare.
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...does it ever get any easier? Letting it go and do what it's meant to do.
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[ that gets vax to laugh, shaking his head. god. that doesn't even begin to cover it. he shifts a bit, bumping his shoulder against rindo's. ]
... It doesn't. I don't think so. I think people like us are always going to want to try and change our path. 's hard, knowing some things are inescapable. [ thoughtful and wry, here. vax looks away, up at the sky overhead. ] She told me once, that you can bend fate and twist it, but never really break it. I think I spent my whole life jumping on the strings of it and fucking it up to try and avoid it.
Even right now. Coming here surprised me - 's making it hard to accept going, again. I thought I had that shit locked up. Turns out you meet a bunch of assholes you like, and you've got to figure out how to say goodbye to them all over again.
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[...but he nods.]
I don't know how to say goodbye very well. I don't think I ever have, even when I did have time to prepare. Letters were a nice idea, but...I don't think I can do that either. So I've been thinking of other ways to try and prepare.