[okay. they'll take him to the bushes of the flowers he named, help show him where to cut so they'll last longer in a vase.]
...You know, I'm proud of you. [...] This stuff is painful, and ugly. Taking a moment after it to be kind, encouraging everybody to be soft in their memories...that's really important stuff.
Everybody deserves to be remembered. Even if I don't know if they [the deceased] can see us, if they can then... maybe they'll know we didn't forget them.
Personally, I don't... really believe people who die are around to see us or have thoughts about the way we remember them. What's gone is gone. But I like to believe they're at peace. Peace is nice.
[kumon can think about it however he wants, though.]
This sort of remembering, honoring them...I find the people who it helps are the ones left behind. Someone else saw the flowers you left last week, and left a note. Someone saw the flowers and the note and decided to leave some origami. And maybe another person saw all of those things together, and had a gentle thought about somebody who's gone.
Grief is a messy, painful process. It can tear you up inside if you let it fester, but going through it is also good for us. What's important is letting ourselves make that transition over time, letting the pain and anger become something that's maybe still sad, or bittersweet, but has a gentler shape. Kind reminders, rituals to honor them, expressing love...all of that is probably helping someone else make that transition through grief.
[Peace is nice, but he's never really been surrounded by this much death before. Are they here, are they gone? He doesn't know. Maybe they are, maybe they aren't. But there are always people left behind.
He has enough awareness that it's something that happens in life, of course. But murders and executions seem... wrong. Having lives cut off so suddenly is something to be mourned.
Kumon listens quietly, nodding slightly. Kindness, honoring them and love. It does help the people who are alive.
His voice is soft, when he asks.]
... Is it supposed to happen so much in such a short amount of time?
[It's hard to process it. It's hard to accept and move forward when it happens every week. When he gets close to accepting their deaths, something else happens and it feels like a backslide. Does it ever really get easier?
But at least he can do this much for everyone. At least, he can give them flowers.]
There's no supposed to with these things. Sometimes, yes, a lot of people die in a short time. And that's hard, but death isn't very concerned with fairness.
I wish it wasn't this way. Especially for all of you. But...the way we handle the worst times matters. You're doing a good thing, that's what I'm trying to say.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
w2, sunday
Hi, Kumon.
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[He gives them a little smile and heads over to them.]
Do you think... maybe we could do the flower thing today too?
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You've got it. It seemed like it worked out really well, didn't it? Somebody started leaving notes, too. You set something in motion.
Did you have ideas for flowers?
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He gives a nod and a smile.]
Maybe... Cosmos for Marie? Do those come in purple?
A green zinnia for Buzen. And I didn't know 9S that well, but maybe a blue thistle?
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They sure do come in purple. Those sound pretty nice to me. Do you want to pick them out?
[they're getting some gardening shears.]
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Yeah, I'll come with you.
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...You know, I'm proud of you. [...] This stuff is painful, and ugly. Taking a moment after it to be kind, encouraging everybody to be soft in their memories...that's really important stuff.
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[He starts cutting the flowers as instructed.]
Everybody deserves to be remembered. Even if I don't know if they [the deceased] can see us, if they can then... maybe they'll know we didn't forget them.
Maybe it'll make them smile.
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Personally, I don't... really believe people who die are around to see us or have thoughts about the way we remember them. What's gone is gone. But I like to believe they're at peace. Peace is nice.
[kumon can think about it however he wants, though.]
This sort of remembering, honoring them...I find the people who it helps are the ones left behind. Someone else saw the flowers you left last week, and left a note. Someone saw the flowers and the note and decided to leave some origami. And maybe another person saw all of those things together, and had a gentle thought about somebody who's gone.
Grief is a messy, painful process. It can tear you up inside if you let it fester, but going through it is also good for us. What's important is letting ourselves make that transition over time, letting the pain and anger become something that's maybe still sad, or bittersweet, but has a gentler shape. Kind reminders, rituals to honor them, expressing love...all of that is probably helping someone else make that transition through grief.
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He has enough awareness that it's something that happens in life, of course. But murders and executions seem... wrong. Having lives cut off so suddenly is something to be mourned.
Kumon listens quietly, nodding slightly. Kindness, honoring them and love. It does help the people who are alive.
His voice is soft, when he asks.]
... Is it supposed to happen so much in such a short amount of time?
[It's hard to process it. It's hard to accept and move forward when it happens every week. When he gets close to accepting their deaths, something else happens and it feels like a backslide. Does it ever really get easier?
But at least he can do this much for everyone. At least, he can give them flowers.]
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There's no supposed to with these things. Sometimes, yes, a lot of people die in a short time. And that's hard, but death isn't very concerned with fairness.
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[If it's enough or not? He can't tell.]
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[it's still touch week, so. a hand on his shoulder, nice and calming.]
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Thanks, Shale.
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