Tosai. [he corrects him because he's himself.] It's a nickname, kinda like how Vax is yours. I don't think I've used his real name since...ever, actually.
[but he nods slowly.]
Riff's still fine, I guess, but...yeah. Rindo. Kashuu and I kinda talked about that too, being a leader and what it actually means. I know nobody gets to decide, but...still would've been kinda nice to be asked.
fret, then. vax stores the name away for now, and then hums a little, thinking. ]
Some people get to choose being great. Some people have greatness thrust upon them. [ it's a phrase someone's said to him before, too. ] And you're left kinda fumbling with it until you figure it out.
'm a big believer in fate, though. Kinda have to be. But it doesn't usually come with any instructions either - think you know that just as well as I do.
I kinda think I've been fumbling with everything for way longer than anyone knows. Fate's so...complicated. You know I used to be able to change it, but even then it was always about guessing.
...does it ever get any easier? Letting it go and do what it's meant to do.
[ that gets vax to laugh, shaking his head. god. that doesn't even begin to cover it. he shifts a bit, bumping his shoulder against rindo's. ]
... It doesn't. I don't think so. I think people like us are always going to want to try and change our path. 's hard, knowing some things are inescapable. [ thoughtful and wry, here. vax looks away, up at the sky overhead. ] She told me once, that you can bend fate and twist it, but never really break it. I think I spent my whole life jumping on the strings of it and fucking it up to try and avoid it.
Even right now. Coming here surprised me - 's making it hard to accept going, again. I thought I had that shit locked up. Turns out you meet a bunch of assholes you like, and you've got to figure out how to say goodbye to them all over again.
I don't know if I'd ever want to break fate. I just wanted to change it to make things work the way they should have the first time.
[...but he nods.]
I don't know how to say goodbye very well. I don't think I ever have, even when I did have time to prepare. Letters were a nice idea, but...I don't think I can do that either. So I've been thinking of other ways to try and prepare.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Surprised you didn't wait until literally the last minute.
no subject
[
you caught him he was trying to be sneaky
he's sitting on the roof's railing at the moment, and doesn't turn around, but he does at least respond. busted. ]
no subject
...maybe the others are. I don't know. We sort of split up again for a little while.
no subject
[ the noise is quiet, responding.
...
and it's quiet, for a while, before he says: ]
... Not that good at goodbyes. I meant it, though. Think your case might be special.
no subject
no subject
[ he sounds
so fond as he says this, getting off of his perch finally and coming over to where rindo is. ]
no subject
...Fret's the one who decided I'd be the leader of our team, not me. I'm still trying to figure out how to be, some days.
no subject
where the look on his face like clearly says "who's fret is this a name you've told me before that i should remember"
... ]
no subject
Bass. He goes by Fret where we're from.
no subject
so badly
it's fine he's trying. ] Fret. That makes you Rindo, huh.
[ his real name... wow ] Rindo. Think no one really gets to decide what a good leader looks like, you know.
no subject
[but he nods slowly.]
Riff's still fine, I guess, but...yeah. Rindo. Kashuu and I kinda talked about that too, being a leader and what it actually means. I know nobody gets to decide, but...still would've been kinda nice to be asked.
no subject
fret, then. vax stores the name away for now, and then hums a little, thinking. ]
Some people get to choose being great. Some people have greatness thrust upon them. [ it's a phrase someone's said to him before, too. ] And you're left kinda fumbling with it until you figure it out.
'm a big believer in fate, though. Kinda have to be. But it doesn't usually come with any instructions either - think you know that just as well as I do.
no subject
...does it ever get any easier? Letting it go and do what it's meant to do.
no subject
[ that gets vax to laugh, shaking his head. god. that doesn't even begin to cover it. he shifts a bit, bumping his shoulder against rindo's. ]
... It doesn't. I don't think so. I think people like us are always going to want to try and change our path. 's hard, knowing some things are inescapable. [ thoughtful and wry, here. vax looks away, up at the sky overhead. ] She told me once, that you can bend fate and twist it, but never really break it. I think I spent my whole life jumping on the strings of it and fucking it up to try and avoid it.
Even right now. Coming here surprised me - 's making it hard to accept going, again. I thought I had that shit locked up. Turns out you meet a bunch of assholes you like, and you've got to figure out how to say goodbye to them all over again.
no subject
[...but he nods.]
I don't know how to say goodbye very well. I don't think I ever have, even when I did have time to prepare. Letters were a nice idea, but...I don't think I can do that either. So I've been thinking of other ways to try and prepare.